Thursday, February 28, 2013

Week of yelling, day 3.

Seriously, Flamingo Las Vegas?  You're fucking charging fourteen ass-balls dollars a day for wifi?  I'm going to a fucking bloggers' conference at your fucking hotel, and you can't fucking spring for free wifi?  I can get that shit from my shitty ass neighbors and I only use their dick-shitty pool when they're not fucking paying attention.

What steel-toed kick-to-the-balls ironic fuckery is this?  Eat a dick, Flamingo.  Eat a bag of dicks.  Eat a dick sundae with whipped dick topping and hot chocolate dick sauce.

You know what I'd rather do than pay for your shitty, overtaxed wifi?  I'd rather slap a fucking otter with another, smaller otter.  I'd rather watch fucking Oprah shit a whole litter of kittens on live-ass testicle-licking television.

I'D RATHER FUCK A FUCKING CHEESE GRATER

I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW THAT WOULD WORK BUT FUCKING PICTURE IT ANYWAY

YOU DICK

(...I'm still totally springing for wifi anyway.  Assholes.)
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4 comments:

  1. Kelly LFebruary 28, 2013 at 12:57 PM

    Almost all hotels I've been to charge for Wifi.

    Also, they comp one device per room each day during BiSC. So, either you or whoever you're rooming with can get free wifi while we're there.

    :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Warmonger SmurfFebruary 28, 2013 at 12:59 PM

      Aww, you just took the jam out of my doughnut. It's too late to unpublish now.

      Delete
  2. StereoMarch 4, 2013 at 8:46 AM

    Hotels that charge for wifi are owned by satan. This is my assessment of the situation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Warmonger SmurfMarch 4, 2013 at 10:58 AM

      No wonder he's doing so well; the luxury hotel business is great for pretty much all seven of the deadly sins.

      Delete

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